John Jay Gourmet

My mother told me to play with food.
(Your dose of confectionary gluttony)

“A lot of food shows need only to tempt. Some food shows only need to inspire, to empower.” - Alton Brown

Welcome to John Jay Gourmet, a blog the founding fathers would be proud of! The purpose of John Jay Gourmet is to serve as an outlet for my creative juices as well as mania for dessert. However, this no ordinary dessert blog. At John Jay Gourmet all of our desserts are created with ingredients found throughout the various dining halls at Columbia University. Warning: these desserts are not for the weary or weak of heart, when you choose to consume them physically or visually, you do so at your own risk. Sickness may occur if you decide to eat such desserts without the help of friends or a strong stomach. You have been warned. Eat up!

What’s it called: Jean Jait Parfait

What’s in it: The Jean Jait Parfait features a delicate blend of viciously delicious vanilla yogurt, bumpin’ banana slices, mixed in with golden brown sugar. In addition, coconut slices lovingly topped add a creamy savor that excites your taste buds while complimenting the relaxing tone of summer.

What it tastes like: The taste of summer is finally upon our dry, coffee stained lips! What better way to celebrate than by having a gigantuous scoop of the Jean Jait Parfait? The warm summer rays upon your vitamin D starved skin as you walk out of Butler have got nothing on this! Taking a bite of this is like relaxing on a secluded beach while puppies and kittens play on your lap after a hard days work, and the grand finale of the Fourth of July parade is illuminating the sky. If you really want a taste of summer, skip the overrated ice cream and spiked lemonade, and take a bite of the Jean Jait Parfait. You’ll be hoping summer never ends!

Notable Enthusiasts: Stephanie Nass and Clemens Auersperg

(Editors note: Props to Stephanie Nass for creating and submitting up with this sumptuous creation!)

What’s it called: Cornapolitan What’s in it:  The Cornapolitan features a southerly comfortable base of cornbread, paired with scoops of a simply blissful combination of vanilla, strawberry and chocolate ice cream. The mouth-watering flavors are accentuated with a light drizzle of nutritiously delightful Nutella topped with color exploding sprinkles, buttery whip cream, and sumptuous strawberry syrup. What it tastes like: Still trying to find the perfect pick-up line for that person you’ve been crushing on for the last four years? Has this passion reached a point where you’re unable to study for finals because you’re too consumed over fulfilling your unquenchable desire to spark conversation and potentially meet the love of your life in the final weeks of school? Well John Jay Gourmet has the solution for you in just the knick of time! Look for courage no further! A bite of the Cornapolitan will not only fulfill any desires to divulge in a life changing dessert for probably the rest of your life, but will also instantly turn you into modern day lyrically genius Casanova. You’ll be filled to the brim with the most exquisitely corny and dreamy pick lines that would even make Bar Refaeli weak at the knees. Lines likes, “Did it hurt when you feel from heaven?” and “Do you take karate, because you’re body is kickin’? (Attempt flying kick) and (my personal favorite) “Wanna play xbox?” are only the tip of the iceberg and are guaranteed to work every time almost all of the time! So throw out your fears and that tiny voice telling you to study. Take a bite of the Cornapolitan and soon you’ll be swooning the girl of your dreams, or (if need be) your professors.

What’s it called: Cornapolitan

What’s in it:  The Cornapolitan features a southerly comfortable base of cornbread, paired with scoops of a simply blissful combination of vanilla, strawberry and chocolate ice cream. The mouth-watering flavors are accentuated with a light drizzle of nutritiously delightful Nutella topped with color exploding sprinkles, buttery whip cream, and sumptuous strawberry syrup.

What it tastes like: Still trying to find the perfect pick-up line for that person you’ve been crushing on for the last four years? Has this passion reached a point where you’re unable to study for finals because you’re too consumed over fulfilling your unquenchable desire to spark conversation and potentially meet the love of your life in the final weeks of school? Well John Jay Gourmet has the solution for you in just the knick of time! Look for courage no further! A bite of the Cornapolitan will not only fulfill any desires to divulge in a life changing dessert for probably the rest of your life, but will also instantly turn you into modern day lyrically genius Casanova. You’ll be filled to the brim with the most exquisitely corny and dreamy pick lines that would even make Bar Refaeli weak at the knees. Lines likes, “Did it hurt when you feel from heaven?” and “Do you take karate, because you’re body is kickin’? (Attempt flying kick) and (my personal favorite) “Wanna play xbox?” are only the tip of the iceberg and are guaranteed to work every time almost all of the time! So throw out your fears and that tiny voice telling you to study. Take a bite of the Cornapolitan and soon you’ll be swooning the girl of your dreams, or (if need be) your professors.

What’s it called: The Eye of Jay What’s in it: The foundation consists of a conglomerate of John Jay sweets including deliciously sumptuous red velvet cupcakes topped with sprinkles, chocolate chips, coconut shavings, and marshmallows. The awe-inspiring tower is supported with delicious homemade brownies topped with a joyously crunchy ice cream cone. Finally, it’s gazing eye boasts another delicious brownie topped with a sugar cookies and heavenly tasty angel food cake lathered in peanut butter. What it tastes like: Still have your knickers in a bunch over who keeps stealing the Nutella? The eye of Jay knows. Although you never know if it’s always watching you, you are certainly always watching it. Watching it, waiting for your next opportunity to sneak up undetected and enjoy a taste of its delicious sweets, rumored to make mere mortals bow down to a life of unending servitude. Your tiny friend with the shiny gold ring won’t get anywhere near this because you would of consumed it before he had a chance to take it off. Next time you’re in the Jay, try not to stare too hard or your eyes may end up being bigger than you’re stomach.

What’s it called: The Eye of Jay

What’s in it: The foundation consists of a conglomerate of John Jay sweets including deliciously sumptuous red velvet cupcakes topped with sprinkles, chocolate chips, coconut shavings, and marshmallows. The awe-inspiring tower is supported with delicious homemade brownies topped with a joyously crunchy ice cream cone. Finally, it’s gazing eye boasts another delicious brownie topped with a sugar cookies and heavenly tasty angel food cake lathered in peanut butter.

What it tastes like: Still have your knickers in a bunch over who keeps stealing the Nutella? The eye of Jay knows. Although you never know if it’s always watching you, you are certainly always watching it. Watching it, waiting for your next opportunity to sneak up undetected and enjoy a taste of its delicious sweets, rumored to make mere mortals bow down to a life of unending servitude. Your tiny friend with the shiny gold ring won’t get anywhere near this because you would of consumed it before he had a chance to take it off. Next time you’re in the Jay, try not to stare too hard or your eyes may end up being bigger than you’re stomach.

What’s it called: The Original What’s in it: The Original features a mixture of everybody’s childhood favorite Fruit Loops, super sweet Frosted Flakes, mouthwatering Oreo cookie crumbs, and taste bud tingling pound cake. Finally, it is topped off with a dash of heart melting chocolate chips and a cascade of refreshing cold milk. What it tastes like:  The dessert that started it all! Everyone can agree the best part about being a kid was Saturday morning: waking up and then going straight to the kitchen in pjs ready to devour a massive bowl of cereal, while watching morning cartoons. The hardest part of the day was trying to decide which cereal you wanted. Well get ready to relive those moments of pure ecstasy with the Original. Just one bite of this and you will be feeling like its Saturday morning all over again, without arduous decision of selecting cereals, because now your taste buds can enjoy them all. Who says dessert is only before or after dinner? The original is the new breakfast. There’s only one dessert worthy enough to be called original, and this is it.

What’s it called: The Original

What’s in it: The Original features a mixture of everybody’s childhood favorite Fruit Loops, super sweet Frosted Flakes, mouthwatering Oreo cookie crumbs, and taste bud tingling pound cake. Finally, it is topped off with a dash of heart melting chocolate chips and a cascade of refreshing cold milk.

What it tastes like:  The dessert that started it all! Everyone can agree the best part about being a kid was Saturday morning: waking up and then going straight to the kitchen in pjs ready to devour a massive bowl of cereal, while watching morning cartoons. The hardest part of the day was trying to decide which cereal you wanted. Well get ready to relive those moments of pure ecstasy with the Original. Just one bite of this and you will be feeling like its Saturday morning all over again, without arduous decision of selecting cereals, because now your taste buds can enjoy them all. Who says dessert is only before or after dinner? The original is the new breakfast. There’s only one dessert worthy enough to be called original, and this is it.

John Jay Gourmet F.I.T. Edition! What’s it called: Birthday Bash What’s in it: A sumptuously moist base layer of rainbow sprinkled birthday cake slathered in deliciously creamy peanut butter. The second layer features heart-melting gooey chocolate chip cookie brownies covered in a magical twist of chocolate and vanilla soft serve. Finally topped with a compliment of rich hot fudge, rainbow sprinkles and savory Reese’s pieces. What it tastes like: You haven’t had a birthday until you’ve had the birthday bash! You know that feeling of overwhelming happiness you had when you were a kid, staring at a table full of unwrapped presents, surrounded by friends? Well, this is that feeling on steroids. You’ll no longer care who’s sweet sixteen it is once you’ve had a bite of this, all you’ll care about is if it is being served and if you can have another bowl. Say goodbye to being the birthday boy or girl only once a year, eating the birthday bash makes you the birthday hero every day. Notable Enthusiasts: Nicolaas Woudenberg (Editors Note: This dessert was created in the dining hall of the Florida Institute of Technology due to limited access to John Jay over winter break)


John Jay Gourmet F.I.T. Edition!

What’s it called: Birthday Bash

What’s in it: A sumptuously moist base layer of rainbow sprinkled birthday cake slathered in deliciously creamy peanut butter. The second layer features heart-melting gooey chocolate chip cookie brownies covered in a magical twist of chocolate and vanilla soft serve. Finally topped with a compliment of rich hot fudge, rainbow sprinkles and savory Reese’s pieces.

What it tastes like: You haven’t had a birthday until you’ve had the birthday bash! You know that feeling of overwhelming happiness you had when you were a kid, staring at a table full of unwrapped presents, surrounded by friends? Well, this is that feeling on steroids. You’ll no longer care who’s sweet sixteen it is once you’ve had a bite of this, all you’ll care about is if it is being served and if you can have another bowl. Say goodbye to being the birthday boy or girl only once a year, eating the birthday bash makes you the birthday hero every day.


Notable Enthusiasts: Nicolaas Woudenberg

(Editors Note: This dessert was created in the dining hall of the Florida Institute of Technology due to limited access to John Jay over winter break)

John Jay Gourmet Christmas Edition! What’s it called: Christmas Tree(t) What’s in it: Every ingredient that adds to the greatness of Christmas What it tastes like: You know that feeling when you wake up on Christmas morning and get to tear into all the presents? You want everything at once, but you just don’t know how to start? Imagine that feeling, if you knew you’d never run out of presents: this is the dessert that keeps on giving. Not only does it look immaculate, it tastes immaculate. This will have you wanting to sing Christmas carols until next Christmas - in between constant mouthfuls of the Christmas Tree(t), of course. Notable Enthusiasts: Everyone who loves Christmas (Editors Note: Special thanks to D.J. Dlesk, Jack (Lightning) Michaud, and Rob (Corndawg) Cornacchia for helping create this wonderful dessert)

John Jay Gourmet Christmas Edition!

What’s it called: Christmas Tree(t)

What’s in it: Every ingredient that adds to the greatness of Christmas

What it tastes like: You know that feeling when you wake up on Christmas morning and get to tear into all the presents? You want everything at once, but you just don’t know how to start? Imagine that feeling, if you knew you’d never run out of presents: this is the dessert that keeps on giving. Not only does it look immaculate, it tastes immaculate. This will have you wanting to sing Christmas carols until next Christmas - in between constant mouthfuls of the Christmas Tree(t), of course.

Notable Enthusiasts: Everyone who loves Christmas

(Editors Note: Special thanks to D.J. Dlesk, Jack (Lightning) Michaud, and Rob (Corndawg) Cornacchia for helping create this wonderful dessert)

What’s it called: The Dudeshake What’s in it: This dessert features creamy vanilla soy milk and fro-yo delicately mixed with sumptuous marshmallows and saliva inducing hot fudge, generously topped with chocolate chips and fluffy whipped cream. What it tastes like: Not only does this look like something made from the dude himself, it tastes like it. One bite of this and you’ll be so content with your life you’ll no longer care about that failed final or wife you were sent to pay ransom for. In addition to finding the key to happiness, everyone will think you’re a total boss and have the tendency to quote every funny thing you say. All in all, if you want to be forever immortalized in the hall of cool, you’ll eat this. The dude abides. Notable Enthusiasts: Josh Fram

What’s it called: The Dudeshake

What’s in it: This dessert features creamy vanilla soy milk and fro-yo delicately mixed with sumptuous marshmallows and saliva inducing hot fudge, generously topped with chocolate chips and fluffy whipped cream.

What it tastes like: Not only does this look like something made from the dude himself, it tastes like it. One bite of this and you’ll be so content with your life you’ll no longer care about that failed final or wife you were sent to pay ransom for. In addition to finding the key to happiness, everyone will think you’re a total boss and have the tendency to quote every funny thing you say. All in all, if you want to be forever immortalized in the hall of cool, you’ll eat this. The dude abides.

Notable Enthusiasts: Josh Fram

The Framinator showing how to eat the Dudeshake in the most cool way possible.

What’s it called: Rojo Bandito What’s in it: This dessert features a base of three mysteriously smooth red velvet cupcakes layered with creamy vanilla icing. The second layer features another layer of cupcakes topping with icing, crunchy oreo crumbles, heart melting vanilla froyo, and sprinkles. What it tastes like: The Rojo Bandito ain’t nothin to mess with amigo. Notorious for its appetite stealing ways, this dessert encapsulates all the best desires with the feeling of knowing you’re getting away with theft. As soon as you have a bite of the bandito it becomes the main course. Like the belle who falls for the mysterious bandit against her will, this dessert will make you abandon reason and succumb to its ways of wrong doing. Notable Enthusiasts: James Glynn

What’s it called: Rojo Bandito

What’s in it: This dessert features a base of three mysteriously smooth red velvet cupcakes layered with creamy vanilla icing. The second layer features another layer of cupcakes topping with icing, crunchy oreo crumbles, heart melting vanilla froyo, and sprinkles.

What it tastes like: The Rojo Bandito ain’t nothin to mess with amigo. Notorious for its appetite stealing ways, this dessert encapsulates all the best desires with the feeling of knowing you’re getting away with theft. As soon as you have a bite of the bandito it becomes the main course. Like the belle who falls for the mysterious bandit against her will, this dessert will make you abandon reason and succumb to its ways of wrong doing.

Notable Enthusiasts: James Glynn